Since giving birth to Benjy about six weeks ago, I hear a lot of "You look great! I can't believe you just had a baby!" and "Wow! You got back into your jeans fast!" and "What's your secret to losing the baby weight?"
I know the people who ask this don't actually want to know how I lost the "baby weight", but if they did, I would tell them this:
1. Give birth (it tends to take away the majority of that weight)
3. Lose ten pounds the first trimester of pregnancy from throwing up
4. Be a skinny person
No one wants to hear that, because #1 is sarcastic, #2 is obvious, #3 is too self-pitying, and #4 is out of anyone's control. I happen to be a skinny person, and I can take no pride in it because it is not the product of anything that I do (as my husband will attest, I have an addiction to junk food). I just am that way, just like some people happen to put on weight more easily than others. And since no one actually wants to hear how I lost weight, I don't have anything to say except nervous laughter (which, written out, looks like "heh heh heh"). Sorry I don't have any magical dieting secrets to give away, but I do have a good joke that I read in a joke book I had in elementary school:
Want to lose ten pounds of ugly fat?
Cut off your head!
heh heh heh
Tell The Doctor To Bring His Sonic Screwdriver
17 hours ago